Dear Lilin,
If you're reading this, don't get me wrong. I don't want to argue with you so I decided to write to you. This evening, I just called to ask whether which colour of shirt I should buy. I understand if you never pick up my phone. But you didn't reply my call or at least ask me what is the matter for the whole night. Why?
Is it because I'm insignificant to you now? You don't want to know anything about my life? I realise these days you shut me off by saying that you need to talk to your mother or father. On Christmas eve, I really don't understand why can't you just sms me back, knowing that I'm waiting for your call or sms to go to your house. I don't understand why I had to wait for your call around your house so that I could go. Didn't you think that I'm waiting? Didn't you want to see me? I really don't understand, you weren't like this.
You said you love me. I kept telling myself you do. But don't you think that your actions do not reflect on what you said? I feel like you have a lot of anger and hatred towards me. It's like as if you're punishing me. Can you please give me a reason? I deserve to know at least.
It's 12 mid night now. I want to call you but afraid that you won't pick up. I want to sms you to say good night and take care of yourself, but afraid that you won't reply. I really don't know what to think or do anymore. Can you? I really want to work things out with you. But things can't work out if I'm the only one loving, caring and trying so hard in this.
Love is simple and happy. It's not a destination, it's the moment being together and being there for one another. Where has our love gone, baby? Please don't let our relationship slip away.
Love,
Your Petty Jot
